How do you do it?

timeTwo people have asked me this question over the last couple of weeks, and I’ve answered with a weary sigh, “I have no idea”.

These two people, both working women with no children, are busy. Very busy. I remember what it was like, before I had kids, when I was busy. So busy that my days and nights were just full and I’d get to the end of the week and think to myself “I can’t possibly go on, I’m so tired!” Then I’d sleep for 12 hours on a Saturday, get all caught up on more sleep and chores, and feel refreshed (more or less) and ready to go on Monday morning.

Then I had kids, and my world turned upside down. And, I’m pretty sure someone stole like six hours out of my day. Seriously. I’m positive that six hours have literally disappeared from my day because I feel like less time exists in which I have to get everything done.

Yes, I know that children take up a lot of time, but it’s insane just how much time those tiny humans suck out of your life!

You ask me how I do it? How do I, a working mother of 2 kids, get it all done?

The answer is I don’t.

I just don’t, it’s not humanly possible.

I may look like I’m getting’ ‘er done, but I’m not.

My kids are (pretty much) clean, bath night isn’t every night.

My kids are fed (for the most part). If you’re a regular reader of my little blog, you’ll know that I’ve had issues feeding my kids, and quite frankly, some nights it’s hot dogs (minus the buns because “I don’t wike dat bwead mama”), for dinner, or nothing at all if they don’t like what I’ve just slaved an hour cooking because if you’re not going to eat it than I guess you’re going to bed hungry. Your choice kid. (also, no desert if you don’t at least try to eat your dinner, so there’s that.)

My house is clean (sort of), in that there isn’t food on the walls or bugs on the floors. But don’t look under the dining room table because I’m pretty sure it’s been a while since I swept under there. And speaking of sweeping, I’m also pretty sure that if you gathered all the dust bunnies we could make one whole REAL bunny, no problem.

The toys (generally) get kicked out of the way (out of stepping-on distance anyway), when I’m just too tired to pick up those 10 things that I just picked up 5 minutes ago! Am I the only one who picks up things around here?!?!! damit!

I try to cook dinner from scratch at least five three nights a week. Even if that dinner is French Toast or pancakes with bacon. Because who doesn’t love breakfast for dinner? The other nights are filled with maccaroni with hot dogs, or salad, or leftovers, rarely fast food because that gets too expensive.

I get my kid to school (almost) on time every day. And by almost I mean we’ve never had to go in through the main entrance because the kindergarten entrance monitor has locked the door for the day.

Everybody goes to bed at a reasonable hour. No, wait, that part is a lie. The preshus gets to bed at a reasonable hour, the peanut is trying to kill me with sleep deprivation, but that’s another blog post.

So there you have it, my life is far from perfect, and I’m far from doing it all, but honestly, I know these days won’t last for ever. And as soon as I’ve figured everything out, I’ll be wondering how the time flew by so darn quickly.

Now, you’ll have to excuse me, I need to leave work like rightnow so I can pick up the kids in time to get them home early and cram dinner in their faces (hot dogs, no buns – least amount of fighting) and get to the school in time for the Holiday concert.

Fingers crossed I don’t fall asleep before my kid hits the stage.

How do you do it?